Thoughts and Reflections

Help

2008-12-01T01:45:00.001+08:00

Visual aids,
hearing aids.
Fucking AIDS...
God(?) help us.

Voices

2008-02-01T02:13:00.000+08:00

All my voices,
Come back and haunt me once again.

Humble me, take me whole,
make me sane .

For without you,
I hear what they have to say

Temptation

2007-12-03T11:54:00.000+08:00

Into that sleep,
I sink slowly..
swimming out with nothing-
to hold or to lose
but dignity
is ripened close to rot,
and the flesh of man was his undoing.
Intoxicating, as water..not wine.

Apples and snakes playing master
but WILL, as usual fails...
banishment? or sweet release?

Happiness

2007-08-27T21:12:00.000+08:00

Lean on me, but I might break.
And since viagra is the new lust, I'd like to be old once again and spend rainy days with you counting minutes till half past bliss.
just hand me a little of your enthusiasm and I'll give all of it right back, because I just want to know how big your heart is - my hands will hold it, even if they shiver, I have your cheeks to warm them.
I'll go to work, just to know you'll get the whole bed to yourself and you can sleep diagonally even - but I'll take a piece of you with me - no not hair, not flesh...but just a thought of morning breath, of my babies floating about in your belly.
With a smile I'll greet you and kiss you goodnight, then hold my own hands that are attached to your body as I watch you sleep and dream of me, be it in colour or monochrome, I know we'll be just as happy as we are in reality...me with my crown and you with a halo of love-light.

Thorn-Wrapped Hope

2007-08-16T10:52:00.000+08:00

Regret and choking sadness reign,
even the tears hold back.
Relief is too dear.

Just pain,
constant and overwhelming.

Though I may not be worthy,
but even the lowliest of dogs..
deserves a heart.

Then again,
hope never dies nor are dreams forgotten.

There's always light at the end f the tunnel.
Though it could be an on coming train,
what if it is heaven bound?

Mine

2006-05-24T19:41:00.000+08:00

I write these words with a borrowed pen,
upon borrowed paper.
Even the thoughts, I borrowed
but what I feel is truly mine;
thats why I am a poet

Regret

2006-02-28T10:03:00.000+08:00

She stabbed me in my heart
with her shoes on.
And left me standing there dripping.
I was hurt, but uninjured;
then I realised that the only constant companion
is regret

a poem that could have been....

2006-02-28T00:19:00.000+08:00

I once had an idea...
but sadly I lost her
so I write this poem
as an ode to my lost thought

Rush

2006-02-22T00:25:00.000+08:00

A sudden rush of passion
Oh what a chemical romance.
As we indulged in that deadly dance.
She cried for help,
and I laughed.
I laughed at my own inadequacy
my border-line lunacy;
bloody hands!!!
Still, I laughed, till the colour drained from her eyes.

To All of Them

2005-07-06T03:10:00.000+08:00

For you are more beautiful in the dark,
the eyes of Heaven bear witness
the heat of the heart beating every nerve,
the scorching sun,
feels like winter...
lifeless.

But the air is wet, dampened with your moist breath,
and I wish to soak in drops or your dew.
Then again...time awaits for my return,
let me search the soul within me
lest I find the questions I have the answers to.
In the end its always about me.

Old Friend

2005-06-29T10:34:00.000+08:00

When I looked up he smiled at me,
the old man in the autumn of his days;
At once I no longer felt alone.
It was his smile..
as deviod of teeth as it was filled with love.
I realised there and then,
that I've just made a new friend.

A Poem for Nobody.

2005-06-20T05:23:00.000+08:00

(Published in 'Harvest of a New Millenium' 2005)

Who would remember a babe born to bear no name
without a heritage, without a home, just abundant pain.
He would stuggle, he would grow, against all odds
to become a boy.
Then who would remember the little boy
whose name is unknown
the world has shown him naught but hatred and scorn
He'd learn to live, he'd have to survive:
One must stay alive.
He has become a man and yet no-one cares
His call for help unheeded,
he remains alone
unwanted, unknown and un-needed.
As life escapes his bones,
the mirrors tell him he's getting old
and time mocks him "your story's untold".
"At last", he says "here comes the end"
and before he finished, he lay dead.
Even in death he found no home,
nothing to love, to claim for his own.
Now he's nothing but a pile of bones
rotting under an unmarked stone.

Palaces of Sand

2005-04-29T20:48:00.000+08:00

Palaces of Sand he built,
in a realm of dreams and illusion.
Upon his palaces came the wind,
she called herself Reality.
Vanish did the palaces
and all he had was a bone to pick,
a broken heart and muddy tears.

Under The Street Lamp

2005-03-17T13:22:00.000+08:00

The silence haunting every moment,
like some unrelenting memory.
Whispers of doubt filling my existence
leading me towards the night.

Faded pictures talk to me,
testament of what once was.
Streaming tears with no meaning,
just for me to live the part.

I just lay there waiting
for the coming of the dark.

A Verse for Home

2005-02-15T00:30:00.000+08:00

The melancholy songs of yonder call to me
from a place I once called home'
where once my heart and soul were one
and joy was mine alone.
It is all dust now,
gone as the morning breeze
my little heaven on earth- just a memory.
My home,
my own,
my shrine all gone.

(dedicated the South Asian Tsunami victims for whom I send my heartfelt sympathies)

Escape

2005-01-24T13:17:00.000+08:00

I've shunned the light for years gone by
and hope do to so for many to come.
Pray the Lord my soul to breathe,
hope to Heaven my heart undone.
Can it be...
At last I'd end my misery.
The voice with in, the lies
telling me "A facade is what it is and will ever be"
Bitter reality, painful light is what it really is
and in the darkness i'd find my abode,
I'd nurture decadence and live the vile,
but at least I'd be free

The fall

2005-01-22T22:26:00.000+08:00

She glides in mystery, that Enchantress from the Heavens. Ensnaring hearts and keeping them....my poor heart was her third. Her gaze intoxictes me beyond the wildest wines, her touch, electric, awakens sensation long dead and forgotten. My butterfly, never truely mine, but she can be no one elses, her wings too frail, only I know how to hold her. Is it love....i know not...then what is it that i feel, neither the words of my tongue nor the scribblings of my pen could translate what goes in my soul...God help me...I am falling.....

Once an Angel

2004-12-28T11:28:00.000+08:00

You were once an Angel, devoid of feeling
of love, hate and jealousy you knew naught.
A rotting wing has let you see
what you were once not allowed.

Fallen Angel, Fallen Angel

You are my sin, my love, my escape from light
my fallen angel, rising demon or just human
take my hand towards the night.

Oh fallen Angel

Forsake your false gods and worship me,
I'd hear your cries,
I'd heed not your lies,
I'd make you whole for eternity.

A Promise

2004-12-16T13:21:00.001+08:00

(Published in 'Taj Mahal Review' June 2005)

I shall worship your Womanliness
in 99 ways upon a pedestal of roses.
As i kneel upon the thorns,
my bleeding knees a sacrifice.

I'd give to you my heart unwrapped,
open, for you to judge.
As I gasp for breath,
my life to you a sacrifice.

You shall receive my faith undaunted,
so pure, so true.
And as I cry for you to look,
I give my love, my last sacrifice.

I dont know...

2004-12-14T01:44:00.002+08:00

She gave me her blood of life,
not the rank of a lover,
yet her soul belonged to mine....
in another place and time
did I cross the line??
I'd bitten the Life thats hers,
yet it was I enslaved.
Heaven......

Tainted Love

2004-12-14T01:44:00.000+08:00

Forgive me father for i have sinned,
I have lusted where i should have loved.
A lust for touch,
a lust for fire,
I tainted Love with my desire.

Innocence Lost

2004-11-19T02:25:00.000+08:00

She said unto him:"You are like the cloud in my clear sky, there only to add to my blue".
But he answered, "But my heart is aflame and my soul is oppressed",
She cried
He sighed
"You poisonous dagger, you loathsome viper, I love thee", she entreated
He only said "But I cannot"
She wept
He knelt

.......to be continued

Frozen

2004-11-17T05:03:00.000+08:00

I fear not death in Herself, its how one would arrive to Death that matters..nothing frightens one than a cold frozen death.
She's dead, they say...but how would i know...her lips are blue the veins bloodless green. but her eyes aflame....woe is me...what is one to do. Should i kiss life into her, but what if the coldness catches onto me..those flames, oh those amber flames draw me but only to get burnt..to die on a pyre what a glorious death. What of her heart..frozen solid...slides about....STAB IT damn it!!!! Stab it...break the ice around it..lets pray the knife would fix it to one place....oh so selfless the poet is.....what is one to do, but it is here where the adventure lies.

Memories

2004-11-06T17:58:00.000+08:00

You are much like a poison i fear. I dont know what it is and i know it shouldnt be. May be its just missed memories haunting me.

Said one heart to another

The Hoax of Time

2004-11-01T02:49:00.000+08:00

Time is what governs every aspect of today's human. Pity though for time doesnt exist. Offensive as that may sound, I appologise because it is man made. Lets see....there is no negation for time (no UN-time) as there is for light darkness,for love hatred. for matter anti-matter.
So what KILLS or NULLIFIES... do enlighten me. Its a man made device created for the blatant murder of freedom and imagination. A subtle obligation to some unknown force made by unknown entities.

The absolute

2004-10-28T15:13:00.000+08:00

Sitting once on my balcony watching a love lorn pair float aboard the magic carpet of their hearts....and I thought: Love is death and death is love- they are one in the same.
Love is only true if it were absolute. in love there is no compromise. In death there exists no compromise either and to be absolute is to be one hence Love and Death are what i would call "Unity in Duality"..like different sides of the same page

The mind

2004-10-25T17:07:00.000+08:00

It has been said that the great events of the world take place is the brain. It is in the brain, and the brain only, that the great sins of the worl take place also..
( from Amber )

Genesis

2004-10-21T20:33:00.000+08:00

To be, to beat or to defeat
retreat, retreat , retreat!!!
Run back to your cradle, your womb,
A tomb!
In Death a beginning, and an end to an end,
where faith and fate know no foe or friend.

Love???

2004-10-21T13:54:00.000+08:00

Its said that "Love's a cliche", but what is to be done about that one must compromise or be left out of a cliche...how sad is that, to be left out. Like a thin wafer of some fragile material floating in the uncertain winds of lonliness. Then again..................well nevermind!

Cross Roads

2004-10-20T21:45:00.000+08:00

Oscar Wilde's "Happy Prince" had a layer of gold sheet on him...but under that gold sheet there was just bronze and lead, like the Prince most men have a rather not so magnificent interior. This is tested when one comes across a corss-road. Decisions to be made, lives to be set--which leads one to the age old question of "are we puppets of destiny, or is destiny ours to make", but nevermind that for now--just remember one never makes the wrong decision because eventually it all becomes right, regardless of the apparent or immediate consequences. Then why worry, why bother- this is what makes humans what they are....glad I am not one ;).

To Her

2004-10-20T14:18:00.000+08:00

My mind is numb,
My Heart is Pure.
You are the Pain i must endure,
You are my Curse,
There is no Cure.

sans titre

2004-10-20T11:16:00.000+08:00

I thought i loved you but then i knew you

.............and in the beginning

2004-10-20T02:14:00.000+08:00

C'est un commencement tres bien. its a very good beginning
Not that its a diary, one may consider this as just a little platform for one to organise one's thoughts.
so..
"A touts les mondes, a touts mes amis, je vous aimes"- to everyone, to the all my friends- i do love y'all